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Yes, we're working with a bunch of campuses trying to undo the effects of
bystander-only or primary prevention-only philosophies which backfired
mightily. Research demonstrating a promising or best practice that results
in an all eggs-in-one-basket approach misses the essential truth that prevention
is multi-faceted and needs to be holistic, not narrowly targeted. We need
education AND information AND risk reduction AND protective behaviors AND
primary prevention AND secondary prevention AND tertiary prevention AND
enforcement AND policy, etc. It's not either/or if we want our efforts to
be effective.
Regards, Brett A.
Sokolow Brett A. Sokolow,
J.D. Attorney-At-Law
 "Best Practices for Campus Health and
Safety"
Managing Partner The National Center for Higher
Education Risk Management, Ltd. (a not-for-profit
corporation) 20 Callery Way Malvern, PA
19355-2969 Tel. (610) 993-0229 Fax (610) 993-0228 Brett Blogs! at
www.ncherm.org
Executive Director,
The National Behavioral Intervention Team Association
(www.nabita.org)
NCHERM serves as counsel/advisor to 14 campuses,
including:
Special Counsel to the Dean of Students, Dominican
University (IL) Special Counsel for Student Conduct Issues, Warren Wilson
College Special Advisor to the University of Texas, San Antonio Special
Counsel, Concordia University (TX) Special Counsel, Northern Virginia
Community College Special Counsel, Southwestern Michigan College Special
Counsel, the Community College of Allegheny County Special Advisor, Vassar
College Special Advisor, Henry Ford Community College
In a message dated 1/3/2011 11:45:47 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,
writes:
This
discussion is extremely important for all of us to continue on campuses
throughout the year. Recently, I ran into a campus that was making much of its
programming decisions based on the "Undetected Rapist" and thus missing a
LARGE percentage of students who may also be committing sexual assaults
(and/or being bystanders to sexual assaults). Like others have said
before, Lisak's research provides some great insight to a specific
demographic. At the same time, we have many more demographics on
campuses being influenced and effected by the various components of sexual
assault.
Your Fan, Mike
Domitrz http://www.DateSafeProject.org Toll-Free:
800-329-9390
***Catch the latest episode of DSP TV at
http://www.DateSafeProject.org
On Jan 3, 2011, at
9:19 AM, Mahri Irvine wrote:
And we can’t forget about the men out
there who know that there are men raping women in the next room, or planning
rapes for the next party, but choose to not do or say anything because it’s
“none of their business” or because they don’t know the women, or any number
of excuses or validations. In my mind, those men are also perpetrators, just
not necessarily primary perpetrators.
Mahri Irvine Doctoral
Student American University Department of Anthropology
“Critiques
should be coupled with collective action. Just as reality without critique
equals self-delusion, critique without action produces only nihilism and
despair." -Randall McGuire (Archaeology as Political Action,
2008:39)
From: Juliette Grimmett [mailto:]
Sent: Sunday, January 02, 2011 9:39 PM To: Cc:
; Subject: Re:
Intention, Sociopaths, and Rape Culture
Fully agree. I just thought I'd
stick with the definition of rape in my discussion which is why I said
92+%
Juliette Grimmett Assistant Director, Women's
Center Interpersonal Violence Services NC State University (919)
515-2012
On Jan 2, 2011, at 9:22 PM, wrote:
I
think that gives men too much credit, Juliette. Lisak's research showed
a 6.3% perpetration rate for rape, only. Sexual assault was not
assessed, nor were relationship violence, stalking or other acts of gender
violence. The four offense definitions were conservative
(statute-based), and not based on campus offense definitions. Broaden
the question, and I think the offender base will broaden as well. Also,
account for the fact that Lisak only studied undetected rapists. Those
who were already held accountable in court or on campus were not
studied. That's a small number, sure, but also broadens the offender
population.
Regards, Brett A. Sokolow Brett A. Sokolow,
J.D. Attorney-At-Law
<ncherm-logo-short.jpg> "Best
Practices for Campus Health and Safety"
Managing Partner The
National Center for Higher Education Risk Management, Ltd. (a
not-for-profit corporation) 20 Callery Way Malvern, PA
19355-2969 Tel. (610) 993-0229 Fax (610) 993-0228 Brett Blogs! at
www.ncherm.org
Executive Director, The National Behavioral
Intervention Team Association (www.nabita.org)
NCHERM serves as
counsel/advisor to 14 campuses, including:
Special Counsel to the Dean
of Students, Dominican University (IL) Special Counsel for Student Conduct
Issues, Warren Wilson College Special Advisor to the University of Texas,
San Antonio Special Counsel, Concordia University (TX) Special Counsel,
Northern Virginia Community College Special Counsel, Southwestern Michigan
College Special Counsel, the Community College of Allegheny
County Special Advisor, Vassar College Special Advisor, Henry Ford
Community College
In a message dated 1/2/2011 9:05:06 P.M. Eastern
Standard Time, writes: one last
thought...
Despite the sexist, often misogynistic, rape culture we live
in where men are entitled and women objectified, most men (on college
campuses, about 92+%) do not commit rape. The ones who do choose to do
so - raping is a choice someone makes.
peace
Juliette
Grimmett Assistant Director, NC State University Women's
Center Interpersonal Violence Services 3120 Talley Student
Center Raleigh, NC 27695 919-515-2012
Want to learn more about
being a peer educator? www.ncsu.edu/themovement P Consider the
environment before printing this email or the attachment.
>>>
"Juliette Grimmett" <> 1/2/2011 4:03 PM
>>> Thank you for your response Abby - you said exactly what I
have been thinking - there is still a small number of men who do it,
therefore there is something else going on here- we can't just say poor men
who are victims of a rape culture. Also, I fully agree that these men
know what they are doing - this is why they call, text, email, facebook,
etc. a couple days after, acting completely normal, or sometimes
apologizing (for their own sake-to make the survivor think they are
remorseful and therefore not report), all to continue being manipulative
and make it even harder for these women to report. Even law
enforcement knows this which is why pre-text phone calls are one of their
investigative tactics in non-stranger rape cases. We all know what is right
and wrong - rape is NOT gray - if someone is crying, passed out, saying no,
totally still, pushing someone away - everyone one of us knows this is
someone not consenting. It's just that some choose not to
care.
peace
Juliette Grimmett Assistant Director, NC State
University Women's Center Interpersonal Violence Services 3120 Talley
Student Center Raleigh, NC 27695 919-515-2012
Want to learn more
about being a peer educator? www.ncsu.edu/themovement PConsider the
environment before printing this email or the
attachment.
>>> "Abby Tassel"
<> 12/29/2010 9:49 AM
>>> Im now wanting to challenge a little as well!
While we
live in a rape culture, research has shown us that only a small percentage
of men rape (although a much larger percentage commit other
sexually-violent crimes). Thus, there is something going on
with these men that allows them to violate at this level. I am not
saying the construct of a diagnosis would be appropriate, just that when
we talk about rape as mistaken hooking up, we are not recognizing
the violent nature of the act. Having heard hundreds if not thousands
of accounts from victims/survivors, it has become clear that these men
know they are hurting someone else when they rape. So, yes, our
culture supports predatory behavior, objectifying, trying to hook up,
but for most men, when women freeze, scream, cry, or otherwise indicate
lack of consent, they stop. For the men who are not going to stop,
the culture provides a camouflage for their behavior. So Frank
and other rapists think that what they are doing is normal. Its
not. I think we need to be careful to not sanitize the violence
along with Frank.
Peace,
Abby Tassel
Assistant
Director
From:
[mailto:] Sent: Thursday, December 23, 2010 3:32
PM To: Subject: Intention, Sociopaths, and Rape
Culture
I wanted to comment and challenge us on a couple of the
assumption that have been made in the responses to these questions about
two tier policies. These assumptions are that very few perpetrators
are unintentional and that most rapists are sociopaths. Lisak's research
is often pointed to validate this perspective.
I think
Lisak's research is very well done and very helpful, but his findings are
often misunderstood out to validate some of our own assumptions: to help us
villainize perpetrators who we are understandably angry at and hurt by and
so that we don't have to collectively take responsibility. Lisak uses the
term "serial rapists" to indicate perpetrators that repeatedly engage in
the behavior. I know many of us connect the terms "serial rapists" with
"serial killers" - who I would agree are often (probably always)
sociopaths. But just because one does something bad repeatedly doesn't mean
one knows what he is doing is bad and doesn't care (sociopath). It could
also mean that he has been taught by the culture that has surrounded him
that what he is doing is not bad, that it is normal, and that it is
expected of him.
We live in a rape culture that mis-educates
us about what is sex and what is rape throughout our lives. Extreme
examples of the rape culture are often shared on this list with calls for
activism to confront them. But we often become oblivious to the more subtle
aspects of rape culture that surround us everyday - even those of us who do
this work everyday. The reason we don't see the rape culture is not because
it is not there, but because it is everywhere. The rape culture encourages,
condones, and teaches men to rape women, only it doesn't call it that. It
calls it hooking up, getting laid, and having sex. As a result of this
rape culture men in particular are taught that the way you hook-up and
have sex includes pressure, coercion, using alcohol to ply invalid
consent, etc. Only we don't call it that. We call it "having game," "being
a sweet talker," "knowing how to butter her up," or "finding a
cheap date." Pardon the heterosexist examples - but heterosexism
and homophobia are also a part of the rape culture. Most men who
have engaged in behavior that meets the legal definition of rape and
the definition of rape in college policies don't define what they have
done as rape (84% according to Koss). I would think that makes them
rapists but perhaps rapists who didn't intend to hurt, violate,
dominate, coerce, or control their victims - although I am sure their lack
of intent to do so does much to change that the victims of
their perpetration feel exactly that. Nor should it.
Now,
let me be clear, this does not excuse, condone, or mitigate
the perpetrators responsibility in anyway shape or form. This is why I
don't think separating intention with unintentional in terms of policy
or sanctioning should be done. I would argue instead this implicates
the rest of us, who contribute to the rape culture ourselves despite
our best of intentions.
If we are going to be effective in
preventing sexual assaults, we have to really understand who the
perpetrators are (as hard as that might be - especially for those who do
this work who are survivors) so that we can be most effective in reaching
them. If we hold sessions telling college men that rape is bad - it is a
tremendous waste of our time and theirs. The sociopaths (who I would argue
are limited but clearly dangerous) aren't going to care. And the nice,
well-meaning, well-intentioned rapist (who I would argue data suggest are
the vast majority) will agree with you wholeheartedly and then continue
hooking up the way they have been taught their whole lives and engaging
in behavior that does indeed meet legal and campus definitions of rape.
In fact, they may perpetrate repeatedly (becoming a serial rapist)
not because they are sociopaths but because they are doing what they
have been taught is expected of them. The problem is with how we have
been taught to hook up our whole lives.
This is why we must
challenge the rape culture by clearly defining consent, clearly defining
informed consent, and beginning to unpack the ways the rape culture has and
continues to mis-educates us so that there are fewer perpetrators and so
that we can begin to challenge, confront, and dismantle the rape culture
that continues to mis-educate others.
--Keith E. Edwards,
PhD
www.menendingrape.org
www.keithedwards.us
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