Discussion List for campus-based and allied personnel working to end gender-based violence on campus.

["Ben Atherton-Zeman" <>]

April is National Sexual Assault Awareness Month.  Every two minutes in the
United States, a man rapes a woman - and it's usually a woman he knows.
Those of us who know victim/survivors of sexual violence know the toll it
takes on them - yet there continue to be numerous examples in our popular
culture of blaming rape victims, glorifying rape culture and apologizing for
rapists' behavior.  

 

This year, Sexual Assault Awareness Month seems to be starting with two such
examples.  An American University article newspaper column berates women who
"cry date rape after you sober up the next morning..."
http://www.awolau.org/2010/03/30/why-is-the-eagle-so-hostile-to-feminists/.
A video game profiled on CNN puts the gamer in the position of rapist - the
gamer gropes, molests and then rapes a teen girl in a subway station in
order to win the game:
http://www.cnn.com/2010/WORLD/asiapcf/03/30/japan.video.game.rape/index.html
.  

 

No, this is not an April Fool's joke.  Anti-rape activists won't be
surprised by these latest examples of rape culture, nor by their tired
justifications ("it's just a game, feminists are anti-sex and have no sense
of humor", etc.).  Neither the game nor the victim-blaming column are unique
- both basically are a restating of traditional misogyny and male
supremacist beliefs.

 

What is exciting to me is the immediate, almost universal anger and
condemnation of both by the online feminist community.  Videos can go
"viral" and so can activism - Facebook status updates and emails from across
the world are condemning both.  Women are writing with boldness and outrage
- men are writing that this is not just a "woman's issue," calling for men
of conscience to speak out against rape and rape culture.  And even though
the CNN article states that it's only "women's groups" that oppose the rape
game, it turns out that men are (finally) speaking out in greater numbers -
speaking out against rape and rape culture.  

 

One example is the new Facebook group, "Ten Thousand Men Supporting Women's
Anti-Violence Groups."  Inspired by Pat Eng of the Ms. Foundation for Women,
this Facebook group encourages men to donate money or time to their local
rape crisis center, domestic violence program, or national anti-violence
group.  

 

Ms. Eng delivered a keynote address at the first National Conference for
Men's Anti-Sexist Groups last year - during her keynote, she encouraged male
aspiring allies to "show, not tell" their commitment to ending gender-based
violence by making a financial donation to such groups.  Most of these
groups, Eng argued, are facing budgetary emergencies because of the economy
- men can help by making a simple donation.  The concept made sense to some
male attendees, who contacted Eng and started the group.  So far, it has
just over 1000 members, at least some of whom have made donations to both
their local groups and the Ms. Foundation.  

 

My friend Matt belongs to our Boston chapter of the National Organization
for Men Against Sexism http://www.nomasboston.org
<http://www.nomasboston.org/> .  He told me, "if women make 78 cents to
every man's dollar, shouldn't we men tithe 22 cents for every dollar we
make?"  Agreed - and what better place to send that money than our local
rape crisis center!  

 

Facebook users of all genders are encouraged to join the Ten Thousand Men
group at http://www.causes.com/tenkmen.  Then invite your Facebook friends -
specifically, those male friends who don't normally do this kind of work.
Even if they can give $5 or $10, it helps - and it may be the first step in
what becomes a lifetime involvement.  

 

Outrage and organizing against sexism and rape culture is also not new -
whether face to face or on the Internet.  But I'm impressed and hopeful
about the use of the Internet and social networking to organize an
articulate response to these latest outrages.  Perhaps if people of all
genders raise our voices in this manner, some day rape will not happen every
two minutes - it'll happen hardly at all.  

 

Ben Atherton-Zeman is a feminist, actor and husband living in Maynard, MA in
the United States.  He is the author of the one-man play, "Voices of Men"
and can be reached through his website, http://www.voicesofmen.org
<http://www.voicesofmen.org/> .  

 

 

Until the violence stops, Ben.  

 

Ben Atherton-Zeman, Maynard, MA USA
Actor, Comedian, Feminist and Husband
Presenting a One-Man Play: "Voices of Men," Educational Theatre for
Sexual/Domestic Violence Prevention - video excerpts at
http://www.voicesofmen.org

Booking information: 978-897-3619

 

Quote of the Month, April 2010: "No Room for Rape Apologists" - Signs posted
at American University protesting an article in the school paper that blamed
victims of rape.  April is National Sexual Assault Awareness Month - support
your local rape crisis center!