Discussion List for campus-based and allied personnel working to end gender-based violence on campus.

["Ben Atherton-Zeman" <>]

I wanted to wish all the wonderful women and men who work to end men's 
violence against women a happy Valentine's Day!

Alexandra Vinson at Emory University did this extremely cute and relevant 
video for last year's Valentine's Day, featuring candy hearts.  It uses humor 
to educate about healthy relationships and warning signs of dating violence - 
a tactic that I approve of heartily.  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Je6sYCa0Q7w - thanks, Alexandra and all the ;
folks at Emory.  

I wish you all healthy relationships and love on this Valentine's Day and 
every day!  Let's keep up this great work...

Until the violence stops, Ben.  
 
Ben Atherton-Zeman, Maynard, MA USA
Actor, Comedian, Feminist and Husband
Presenting a One-Man Play: "Voices of Men," http://www.voicesofmen.org
Booking information: 978-897-3619
 
Quote of the Month: February 2009:

"Is the content of The Vagina Monologues appropriate for high school 
students? No. Absolutely not. Teenagers should not be dealing with issues of 
rape, domestic violence and abuse. however.[we] already deal with these 
[problems] on a daily basis.It is absolutely appropriate for women (and men) 
to have a forum to deal with these issues in a safe and positive 
environment."  - from Rob Okun's column on www.VDay.org.  Support VDay 
locally and nationally!

Come to the Men Can Stop Rape conference in Washington, DC April 14-15: 
http://mencanstoprape.org/conference/
>From 
>
>  Fri Feb 13 14:17:36 2009
Return-Path: 
<>
X-Original-To: 

Delivered-To: 

Received: from fork8.mail.virginia.edu (fork8.mail.Virginia.EDU
        [128.143.2.178])
        by list.mail.virginia.edu (Postfix) with ESMTP id 966D9CDC7
        for 
<>;
 Fri, 13 Feb 2009 14:17:36 -0500 (EST)
Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1])
        by fork8.mail.virginia.edu (Postfix) with ESMTP id 4A88B1F5158
        for 
<>;
 Fri, 13 Feb 2009 14:17:36 -0500 (EST)
Received: from fork8.mail.virginia.edu ([127.0.0.1])
        by localhost (fork8.mail.virginia.edu [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new,
        port 10024) with ESMTP id 19180-07 for 
<>;
        Fri, 13 Feb 2009 14:17:36 -0500 (EST)
Received: from iron4.mail.virginia.edu (iron4.mail.Virginia.EDU
        [128.143.2.114])
        by fork8.mail.virginia.edu (Postfix) with ESMTP id 0F8931F5152
        for 
<>;
 Fri, 13 Feb 2009 14:17:36 -0500 (EST)
X-IronPort-Anti-Spam-Filtered: true
X-IronPort-Anti-Spam-Result: 
AggEAHNWlUnOLq0JaWdsb2JhbACNIYctDQgNBxCuawkQR44CgmeBNQY
X-Sender-IP: 206.46.173.9
Received: from vms173009pub.verizon.net ([206.46.173.9])
        by iron4.mail.virginia.edu with ESMTP; 13 Feb 2009 14:17:35 -0500
MIME-version: 1.0
Content-transfer-encoding: 8BIT
Content-type: text/plain; charset=windows-1252; format=flowed
Received: from [192.168.1.41] ([71.123.83.45]) by vms173009.mailsrvcs.net
        (Sun Java(tm) System Messaging Server 6.3-7.04 (built Sep 26 2008;
        32bit)) with ESMTPA id 
<>
 for
        
;
 Fri, 13 Feb 2009 13:17:04 -0600 (CST)
Message-id: 
<>
Date: Fri, 13 Feb 2009 14:17:10 -0500
From: rob 
<>
User-Agent: Thunderbird 2.0.0.19 (Windows/20081209)
To: 

Subject: Re: Respect for Women Far Outlasts Valentine's Day Flowers
References: 
<>
In-reply-to: 
<>
X-UVA-Virus-Scanned: by amavisd-new at fork8.mail.virginia.edu
X-Mailman-Approved-At: Sat, 14 Feb 2009 18:24:13 -0500
Cc: fcrc 
<>,
 
,
        
,
 
,
        
,
 
,
        

X-BeenThere: 

X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.9
Precedence: list
Reply-To: rob 
<>
List-Id: "Discussion List for sexual assault educators and counselors on
        campus." <sapc.list.mail.virginia.edu>
List-Unsubscribe: <https://list.mail.virginia.edu/mailman/listinfo/sapc>,
        
<mailto:?subject=unsubscribe>
List-Archive: <https://list.mail.virginia.edu/mailman/private/sapc>
List-Help: 
<mailto:?subject=help>
List-Subscribe: <https://list.mail.virginia.edu/mailman/listinfo/sapc>,
        
<mailto:?subject=subscribe>
X-List-Received-Date: Fri, 13 Feb 2009 19:17:36 -0000

Thought you'd be interested in this op-ed .
Onward,
Rob
Please note new e-address: 

--

Rob Okun, Editor
/Voice Male / magazine
male positive, pro-feminist
33 Gray St.  Amherst, MA 01002
413.687-8171  

new website under construction: www.voicemalemagazine.org
Chair, National Advisory Board, Men’s Resource Center for Change


*Respect for Women Outlasts Valentine’s Day Flowers*

By Rob Okun


Romance and love are ideals worth celebrating everyday, not just on
Valentine’s Day and men. Just as December has been designated as
gift-giving season, society—marketers, actually—spotlight mid-February
for pitching romance and love. As generosity and gratitude are given
short shrift in December, scant attention is paid to healthy
relationships on Valentine’s Day.

The culture surrounding the holiday is in transition and in
Massachusetts men are taking the lead. Rather than focusing on flowers
and jewelry, men are pledging: “From this day forward, I promise to be
part of the solution in ending violence against women.” Part of the
White Ribbon Day Campaign, an international effort to engage men and
boys to help end violence against women, White Ribbon symbolizes a
social movement to transform men from perpetrators or bystanders of
violence against women to advocates on behalf of girls’ and women’s
safety. Activities across the Baystate have focused on Valentine’s Day.

The White Ribbon Campaign was founded in Canada, two years after the
December 6, 1989 Montréal Massacre in which 14 women students at a
poly-technical institute were systematically killed and 13 other
students wounded by a lone gunman. One hundred thousand men wore ribbons
across Canada that first year. White Ribbon has since gone worldwide and
is in 50 countries, having accumulated five million signatures and
counting.

Working with men over the years, especially listening to college-age men
initiating campus campaigns to challenge male violence, I hear a growing
chorus of young men eager to help create a culture promoting mutuality
and respect over superiority and domination. The tragic stories of
violence in communities across the Commonwealth, the country and
world—from harrowing cases of domestic abuse to brutal sexual
assaults—are disheartening. But “antiviolence men’s work” is gaining
adherents. The movement now has an important ally in the White House: As
a senator, Vice-president Joe Biden led the way in urging Congress to
pass the historic Violence Against Women Act. In September, he told me
it was the piece of legislation of which he was most proud.

Craig Norberg-Bohm, coordinator of the men’s initiative at the
Boston-based Jane Doe Inc., the statewide coalition of sexual assault
and domestic violence programs, spearheads White Ribbon Day efforts in
the Baystate. He crisscrosses Massachusetts, training men in violence
prevention strategies and broadcasting what he learns about innovative
campaigns—from men’s newspaper signature ads decrying a culture of
violence to Fourth of July parade floats that proclaim “hands are not
for hitting.”

The drumbeat is growing louder to create the culture of respect and
safety Norberg-Bohm promotes, and the efforts of men’s programs and
organizations regionally, nationally and internationally, both celebrate
positive masculinity and invite men and boys to be leaders in helping
end violence against women. In addition to activities in state, major
men’s conferences advocating an end to violence against women are
scheduled in at the end of March in Rio de Janeiro, April in Washington,
D.C. and May in New York. (February has long been a month spotlighting
ending violence against women, thanks to V-Day, the international
campaign that grew out of productions of Eve Ensler’s powerful play,
/The Vagina Monologues/).

What can men do? Become an “ambassador”, inviting other men to take the
White Ribbon pledge, to wear a white ribbon and speak out against
violence against women, sexual assault and domestic violence. Encourage
faith communities to deliver the message that men must and are taking
responsibility to end men’s violence against women. Highlight the
inspiring and creative work being done by and with men in communities
throughout Massachusetts and the country, and encourage their replication.

It’s a powerful message when men proclaim: “From this day forward, I
promise never to commit, condone or remain silent about violence against
women, sexual assault and domestic violence. I promise to be part of the
solution in ending violence against women.”

To coin a phrase, the time for talking is over. It’s time for men to
take action to create a peace and justice stimulus package that declares
respect and safety for women and girls (as well as for boys and men)
must be a key part of any societal recovery plan. That’s Valentine’s Day
present we could all appreciate receiving.

/Rob Okun is editor of /Voice Male /magazine. To receive a copy of the
newly expanded /Voice Male, /write him at 
rob@voicemalemagazineorg./



Ben Atherton-Zeman wrote:
>
> I wanted to wish all the wonderful women and men who work to end men's
> violence against women a happy Valentine's Day!
> Alexandra Vinson at Emory University did this extremely cute and
> relevant video for last year's Valentine's Day, featuring candy
> hearts. It uses humor to educate about healthy relationships and
> warning signs of dating violence - a tactic that I approve of
> heartily. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Je6sYCa0Q7w
> <http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Je6sYCa0Q7w> - thanks, Alexandra and
> all the folks at Emory.
> I wish you all healthy relationships and love on this Valentine's Day
> and every day! Let's keep up this great work...
>
> Until the violence stops, Ben.
>
> Ben Atherton-Zeman, Maynard, MA USA
> Actor, Comedian, Feminist and Husband
> Presenting a One-Man Play: "Voices of Men," http://www.voicesofmen.org
> <http://www.voicesofmen.org>
> Booking information: 978-897-3619
>
> Quote of the Month: February 2009:
> "Is the content of The Vagina Monologues appropriate for high school
> students? No. Absolutely not. Teenagers should not be dealing with
> issues of rape, domestic violence and abuse… however…[we] already deal
> with these [problems] on a daily basis…It is absolutely appropriate
> for women (and men) to have a forum to deal with these issues in a
> safe and positive environment." - from Rob Okun’s column on
> www.VDay.org <http://www.VDay.org>. Support VDay locally and nationally!
> Come to the Men Can Stop Rape conference in Washington, DC April
> 14-15: http://mencanstoprape.org/conference/
> <http://mencanstoprape.org/conference/>
> __._,_.___
> Messages in this topic
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/message/3265;_ylc=X3oDMTM0OXBpZjduBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBG1zZ0lkAzM4MTQEc2VjA2Z0cgRzbGsDdnRwYwRzdGltZQMxMjM0NTUxNzU1BHRwY0lkAzMyNjU->
> (3) Reply (via web post)
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/post;_ylc=X3oDMTJwaW1nNG5oBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBG1zZ0lkAzM4MTQEc2VjA2Z0cgRzbGsDcnBseQRzdGltZQMxMjM0NTUxNzU1?act=reply&messageNum814>
> | Start a new topic
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/post;_ylc=X3oDMTJlZWVlbDdqBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA250cGMEc3RpbWUDMTIzNDU1MTc1NQ-->
>
> Messages
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/messages;_ylc=X3oDMTJlNzN0aWl0BF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA21zZ3MEc3RpbWUDMTIzNDU1MTc1NQ-->
> | Files
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/files;_ylc=X3oDMTJmZnVnazlhBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA2ZpbGVzBHN0aW1lAzEyMzQ1NTE3NTU->
> | Photos
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/photos;_ylc=X3oDMTJlcThuNTk4BF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA3Bob3QEc3RpbWUDMTIzNDU1MTc1NQ-->
> | Links
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/links;_ylc=X3oDMTJmMjVsZnVpBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA2xpbmtzBHN0aW1lAzEyMzQ1NTE3NTU->
> | Database
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/database;_ylc=X3oDMTJjN244dnJwBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA2RiBHN0aW1lAzEyMzQ1NTE3NTU->
> | Polls
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/polls;_ylc=X3oDMTJmZDZxcXBqBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA3BvbGxzBHN0aW1lAzEyMzQ1NTE3NTU->
> | Members
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/members;_ylc=X3oDMTJlNzAxN25sBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA21icnMEc3RpbWUDMTIzNDU1MTc1NQ-->
> | Calendar
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/calendar;_ylc=X3oDMTJkaWkwdWZ0BF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA2NhbARzdGltZQMxMjM0NTUxNzU1>
>
> ----- ----- -----
> <*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> 
> MARKETPLACE
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> From kitchen basics to easy recipes - join the Group from Kraft Foods
> <http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIGr6g7adj/MI3064.12016295.13271503.10835568/D=groups/S05015362:MKP1/Y=YAHOO/EXP34558956/L=/B=nuxAF0PDhFI-/J34551756384256/AU30388/R=0/SIGnuutlas/*http://explore.yahoo.com/groups/kraftmealsmadesimple/>
>
> Yahoo! Groups
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/;_ylc=X3oDMTJkbjAzbGY2BF9TAzk3NDc2NTkwBGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA2dmcARzdGltZQMxMjM0NTUxNzU1>
>
> Change settings via the Web
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/join;_ylc=X3oDMTJmMzRicWZ1BF9TAzk3NDc2NTkwBGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA3N0bmdzBHN0aW1lAzEyMzQ1NTE3NTU->
> (Yahoo! ID required)
> Change settings via email: Switch delivery to Daily Digest
> <mailto:?subject=Email%20Delivery:%20Digest>
> | Switch format to Traditional
> <mailto:?subject=Change%20Delivery%20Format:%20Traditional>
>
> Visit Your Group
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence;_ylc=X3oDMTJkYnFyNjRuBF9TAzk3NDc2NTkwBGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwNmdHIEc2xrA2hwZgRzdGltZQMxMjM0NTUxNzU1>
> | Yahoo! Groups Terms of Use <http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> |
> Unsubscribe
> <mailto:?subject=>
> Recent Activity
>
>    *
>       2
>       New Members
>       
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/members;_ylc=X3oDMTJmaWFpYjZuBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwN2dGwEc2xrA3ZtYnJzBHN0aW1lAzEyMzQ1NTE3NTU->
>    *
>       2
>       New Files
>       
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence/files;_ylc=X3oDMTJnMW1xdm43BF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwN2dGwEc2xrA3ZmaWxlcwRzdGltZQMxMjM0NTUxNzU1>
>
> Visit Your Group
> <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/menagainstviolence;_ylc=X3oDMTJlNjljdTVnBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BGdycElkAzgxMDE2MjkEZ3Jwc3BJZAMxNzA1MDE1MzYyBHNlYwN2dGwEc2xrA3ZnaHAEc3RpbWUDMTIzNDU1MTc1NQ-->
>
> John McEnroe
>
> on Yahoo! Groups
> <http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIGo5alc6s/MI3064.12016283.12445687.8674578/D=groups/S05015362:NC/Y=YAHOO/EXP34558956/L=/B=oexAF0PDhFI-/J34551756384256/AR02321/R=0/SIGaijbghb/*http://new.groups.yahoo.com/allbrangroup>
>
> Join him for the
>
> 10 Day Challenge.
>
> Dog Fanatics
>
> on Yahoo! Groups
> <http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIGogclbh2/MI3064.12016263.12445670.8674578/D=groups/S05015362:NC/Y=YAHOO/EXP34558956/L=/B=o.xAF0PDhFI-/J34551756384256/AH36045/R=0/SIGo19ppl5/*http://advision.webevents.yahoo.com/dogzone/index.html>
>
> Find people who are
>
> crazy about dogs.
>
> Weight Loss Group
>
> on Yahoo! Groups
> <http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIGps9tbgc/MI3064.12016300.12445692.11323196/D=groups/S05015362:NC/Y=YAHOO/EXP34558956/L=/B=pOxAF0PDhFI-/J34551756384256/AQ70419/R=0/SIGb5gu1oe/*http://new.groups.yahoo.com/specialKgroup>
>
> Get support and
>
> make friends online.
>
> .
>
> __,_._,___


--